Saudi Wedding
After living here for almost six years, I (Charmagne) had one of the most amazing cultural experiences to date. A few weeks ago, I was invited to a Saudi wedding and while I don’t have any pictures to share with you, I will try as best as I can to paint a picture of the evening for you…
I was invited to the wedding by the mother of the bride. For those of you who read our blogs/website on a regular basis, this invitation came from the same family that has invited us to their ranch on a number of occasions and whose members have truly been wonderful examples of Saudi hospitality and culture.
Now the wedding…
The wedding began at 10:00pm, but truth be told, I was so excited to be going, that between the adrenaline rush and the evening glasses of coffee, I was not at all tired. And despite the offical 10:00pm arrival time, I was told to come sometime a little later, as the bride would not be entering the hall until midnight. So, armed with that knowledge, I dressed for another party (celebrating Diwali) that was being held at the deputy ambassador from India’s house and attended this engagement first. (When it rains, it pours!) The Diwali party was a lot of fun, but alas, 10:00pm came and I, along with my friend Crystal, who’d be accompanying me to the wedding, changed party clothes and off we went.
We arrived at the reception hall at about 10:45pm, in our school van (about the size of a VW bus), right behind an expensive Mercedes and in front of an equally expensive Audi. We knew that we were clearly in the right place. We entered the reception hall (though palatial would really be the appropriate word to describe the size of the hall), checked our abayas and eventually found what we presumed was the reception. No, we didn’t crash another party, but we weren’t in the “official” reception room; we were in what could only be deemed the world’s largest parlor. There must have been at least 60 seating areas (all with three sofas and a coffee table, full of sweets) in this room. So, we walked into the “parlor” through the main entrance and were greeted, thankfully, by the bride’s sister, who must have seen the confusion on our faces. She kindly explained what we were to do and off we went to find the mother of the bride, Munera, who looked incredibly elegant in her rose colored gown. Munera showed us to a seating area where we sat with other foreign women and were later joined by a parent from the school. We sat in complete awe of the incredibly beautiful women around us in gowns - truly amazing gowns on some, incredibly unique gowns on others and some stunningly gaudy gowns on others.
Here we sat eating and drinking, served by women in an orchestrated dance, until a little past midnight. We had coffee and sweets, tea and cakes, juice and savory items and finally water. Once that sequence was finished, the servers started all over again. Needless to say, we ate and drank a lot, while we chatted with the other women in our seating area, people watched and listened to a band play traditional music, while some women danced. (The band was all female. In fact, weddings are predominately gender segregated affairs - and apparently the women have a lot more fun at their weddings than the men at theirs!)
At a little past midnight, the lights dimmed and the door at one end of the “parlor” opened and in walked three adorable girls in beautiful Haute-couture dresses. They walked the length of the room, down a sort of catwalk. Along each side of the catwalk sat the matriarchs and what must have been the more important family members on couches, arranged in a sort of wavy-line. At the end of one of these lines, closest to the end, sat one of the wives of the late king. I never imagined being at a wedding with women of this social class. Yea - not only were we among the elite, we were totally under dressed. After the young girls made their entrance, the doors opened again and there stood the bride in a Haute-couture bridal gown, looking absolutely stunning and amazingly beautiful. She too walked down the catwalk, which took about 15 minutes. After her procession, she sat at the end of the catwalk on a set of sofas. Women then got up and paid their respects. The orchestrated serving mentioned earlier continued in full swing.
At about 1:30am, perhaps closer to 2:00am, the doors opened again and in walked the groom, his immediate family and the bride’s family. The men walked swiftly towards the front while the women in the room nominally covered their heads and a few their faces. The families spoke for a while up front among themselves, and later some of the people paid their respects. After about 20 minutes the men left, taking leave from the matriarchs along the catwalk, leaving the groom up front. He stayed for a while longer and then left with the bride down the catwalk.
Now, one might presume that this was the end, but oh no, not even close. On two movie theater size screens (everything up to this point had been shown on those two screens, as if you were at a concert. And if you weren’t up front, it would have indeed been difficult to see), we saw pictures of them leaving and entering the banquet hall - indeed, it was going to be a long night. In the banquet hall, which had heretofore been closed off from the palatial parlor, there were elaborately decorated tables, a cake with seven layers that rose taller than I am, beautiful flowers and a buffet that ran the course of the room. We watched the bride and groom cut the cake and make a toast with date “wine.” After this, we were invited in to dine, but only after incense was brought around to each person. (We were meant to waft the smoke in our faces and freshen up.)
The food was amazing (everything from traditional Arab food to caviar and lobster tail) and the hall even more beautiful up close and personal. Everyone ate, including the servers, the band, the nannies who had come to watch after the children, etc. Even in the midst of their own celebration, we saw the perfect example of Saudi hospitality. We ate until 3:30am when, out of exhaustion, we decided to go home. The wedding, though, continued on throughout the morning and ended sometime around 8:00am. (Apparently they usually end at about 5:00am!)
So, I can’t imagine that I left anything out. It was a beautiful wedding and an experience that I never thought I would have and for which I am truly grateful!